I like today

Even though late ultrasounds are usually due to there being a possible issue, I'm so happy I got to see my lil baby boy today. We got a new disc of pics and took home some new pics for his ultrasound album. I am doing much better than last week and feeling a little more confident that he'll keep cooking until January, like he's supposed to. Doc says he looks good, and I'm proud to say he's 4.5 pounds. He is in the 51st percentile for this gestation, so he's average weight. We had been thinking maybe he's smaller than average since I seem to be showing small (as I still hear all the time).

Then we went to the mall and I got "What to Expect the First Year." Tried to find some books on labor coping techniques but we'll actually probably go find a video soon. We found some fun onesies for baby. One says "I want to surf like my daddy" and the other says "I ♥ boobies" - you can guess which one my hubby found most amusing. I also got a nursing bra that is so comfy, and a new shirt that actually has room for my belly. The bra needed to have room for growth since I haven't got my milk in yet and I never ever imagined buying a D-cup bra...so weird for me! I hope I don't completely shrivel and can still fill a A-cup after breastfeeding. Never know...

There's a lot of things I'm starting to wonder about my body post-pregnancy. It has changed so much and if all goes according to plan, this won't be my last pregnancy, so more changes await. I look at my pre-pregnancy pictures and I can bet that I'll never look like that again. Not that it's not worth it; I guess it's just another sacrifice you make to be a mama. As long as hubby still thinks I'm sexy it's aaallllll gooooooood.

What a week

Time has flown since I shared the details of my horrible morning last Tuesday. And Tuesday morning wasn't the end...

I started having abdominal pain in the afternoon that I tried to wait out and let it pass, but it just wouldn't. It hurt to move and I was even tender to the touch sometimes. It was kinda scary after a couple hours so I called my doctor. I was advised to drink lots of water and rest; if the pain doesn't stop in 30-minutes, go to Kapiolani L&D (which is where premies need to be delivered). I ended up going to Kapiolani via the emergency department. Luckily my hubby was off work so he was able to drive me and help keep me calm. Of course my mind was racing, but he reminded me to not assume the worst.

By the time I actually got to see a nurse, my pain had gone down a lot. Long story short, we were there for about 3-hours. I was put on monitoring, gave a urine sample, got an ultrasound, and a couple cervix checks. They calmly told me I was having contractions - since they were calm I assumed I should be too, but it was weird to hear. Since the contractions didn't seem to be changing my cervix, they sent me home with an antibiotic prescription to clear up anything that could be causing complications. I can't remember the last time I took an antibiotic, but I didn't hesitate when it comes to making sure I'm doing everything I can and am supposed to do to benefit the baby.

One thing that made the visit positive was that we got to see him on the ultrasound. Turns out he's already head down. When I thought he was kicking my hip bone, he is actually punching it, while my ribs are getting the actual kicks. Fun to know (still not so fun to feel sometimes, lol). The doc actually did two ultrasounds - the first was to gather info on him, the second was to demonstrate to a new doc how to identify measuring points on a fetus. She said he has great markers (or something like that). Our baby has already been a model example!

Okay, this is turning out longer than I planned, but there's more...

I had to see my doc within a few days to follow-up on all this, rather than waiting for my appointment I had scheduled for the next week. I was glad to see her but it really turns out that I may just be what she called, "a cramper." That's not to say I shouldn't continue to take it easy, but it's good to know what I'm prone to and how to possibly manage it. So it'll be a couple about 2 more months of lots of rest and LOTS of water. Been drinking at least 2-liters a day now. She gave me another prescription for emergency use if I start having regular contractions in an hour in the next few weeks. Another one of those things that I'm glad I have it but the fact that I might need it is kinda scary. Praying that bottle never gets opened!

And finally - on a much lighter note - I awoke from a nap this afternoon with a wet spot on the right side of my tank top. Huh??? Lol. Actually my hubby noticed it first and we realized it was leakage. My tank was dark so I don't know what color it was. I washed it as soon as I realized the spot wasn't going away after a couple hours, but there's still a slight mark right on the boob. Good thing I usually wear it under something. Now I'm paranoid about my shirts and bras. I have some disposable pads but I don't wanna use them up before the baby comes. I'm gonna go get some washable ones which I think are best used for smaller leaks anyways.

To sum it all up...Being pregnant is a trip.

The latest

Just had my monthly check-in with my doctor and as usual I didn't get in the exam room for 45+ minutes after I got there and the reception girl was rude and incompetent as ever. Oh well... My doctor did apologize and seemed sincerely bothered I had been out there so long, but we wait an average of 20-30 minutes every time we've gone so I dunno. I always feel better after we get in there and get to talk about the baby and stuff.

I'm going to be 17-weeks along on Sunday. I've only gained 3-pounds but that's 2 in the last month so I guess I'm on the right track. Been spending a lot of time looking at boy names and researching meanings, popularity, sounding it out with our last name and potential middle names. Boys names are so hard! I could probably pick one, but my hubby and I have yet to agree. Good thing we have about 5-months to argue - I mean "decide". ;)

Trying to prepare for our visit home. We need to decide what we'll wear to the wedding and how to pack the stuff we're bringing back (like clothes we haven't worn since we moved here), and even trying to have a tentative itinerary with family and friends; all that fun stuff. I wish I could pack now haha but I don't want my stuff to get all musty staying in the suitcase too long or be perma-wrinkled. I'm just excited, well also anxious because our time is so divided; not only between both families - which is lopsided since there is a wedding on his side - but there are dear friends we would love to spend quality time with that I hope works out. I extended my stay which is gives me slightly more flexibility, but it also separates me from my love for 4 days. It's so hard to be apart from him. I'm glad we both feel that way after all this time though. That's a blessing I'll never take for granted.

♥

It's a BOY!

We've been waiting for this day for 5 weeks! Our last appointment was too early to tell what the sex was, plus the back was turned most of the time. I asked the little one a few times up until today for some cooperation and thankfully we got it today: legs wide open for us to see the goods, lol.

My honey is very happy to have a boy first. He definitely wants a daughter, but a boy first. I have always always wanted a son, but once I found out I was pregnant, I didn't feel any preference, which was surprising to me. All I know is I was overjoyed to hear, "It's definitely a boy." I had to hold back most of my tears the whole appointment so I could listen and watch - didn't want to miss a thing. The doc was koo and pointed out specific sections of the brain and the chambers of the heart (so cool). He let us know the spine, heart, and brain are looking good but we won't know the full results for anomalies using the pics and my blood draw for about another week. I was just glad to see that heart beating strong and our little baby boy being so active still. ♥

I'll call it, "Feeling pregnant"

So I'm about 14-weeks along now and just saw the doctor for our monthly check in last Friday. She didn't seem convinced that our due date should be changed so I've adjusted it in my mind a couple days, Lol. All I was happy to hear was the sound of our baby's heartbeat through the doppler. What an amazing sound. ♥

Heading into this second trimester I'm barely showing at all but I'm feeling more pregnant...I think. Not that I really know what that feels like since this is my first, but that's what I'm calling it. I am so tired and so hungry, and my back is hurting. The tired and hungry I get, but back pain already?! It's my lower back, mostly on the left lately. It will even shoot down my leg if I lean just right. Fun stuff. I used to think it would flare up from lying down too much, but recently it starts to hurt when I've been standing or walking a bit. I may need new slippers or orthotics for my work shoes. I may need to actually take a break at work. I may just need to wait until my body continuously adjusts to its changing self; that could take a while. I expected back pain when I have a cantaloupe in front of me, but not a lemon.

Still working my 3 shifts per week and exercising 2-3 times per week. I'd say I'm active enough, which I hope in time will curb my fatigue. I definitely miss surfing with my boo, and he misses it too. :( That was our quality time for almost a year. We're learning how to spend time in the ocean together other ways and even going for more walks. It doesn't replace surf time but I just love spending time with my love either way.

I can barely imagine being pregnant anywhere else. It's warm here, always, but not too hot if you're in the right spot. You can wear comfy dresses every day without freezing. The ocean is your playground and you won't ever be the only preggo in a swimsuit. It would be even harder to get me off my butt if it was cold outside haha. I'll have to experience that at some point but for now, I'm loving where I'm at for my first pregnancy.

Alooooooha!

Last week was awesome

I meant to post about my amazing week last week but it flew by and I still feel like life is flying by. Monday we had our 2nd ultrasound and were able to hear the heartbeat AND see our little bean jumping and dancing around. I gotta admit I'm not liking the 3D pics better at this point but that may be because the baby's back was turned by the time we were using that wand. Either way, it was an amazing experience and I'm so excited to know the baby is doing well and is lively already! Our next scheduled ultrasound is mid-August. Can't wait!

Although there is now a possible variance of a week in how far along I am, we felt it was an ok time to share the news win the world. We officially announced it via texts, emails, and of course Facebook/Twitter (we're a modern couple ya know). It felt great to share and get excited with everyone now. It was so hard to keep it in for over a month but it was worth the wait.

Then mine and my hubby's 3-year anniversary was on Wednesday last week. He ended up having to work but treated me to a shopping spree the day before at HIC and just made me feel so special. He's the best and I'm blessed beyond what I could've imagined for myself. He is truly my soulboo. I'm so thankful I only love, miss, adore him more and more as time goes on. God is so good.

That's the main highlights of the week. It felt like more events at the time but I must have just been on some natural high Lol.

So far this week has carried over the exhaustion I was feeling last week. I'm so tired again; I thought I was getting past that but I'm feeling it more than ever now. And more than that, I'm feeling HuNgRy!! Its out of control really. Sometimes hard to keep finding new things to eat - seriously! I don't seem to be gaining weight yet though but I'm sure it's on the way. I do hope so!

[pic: hungry monster...and yes, as a matter of fact i am hungry]

>>Strong heartbeat

Our appointment last Friday went awesome (once we got into the room...long story short, my doctor's staff is...blah). J had worked the night before but he woke up once the ultrasound started. The doctor turned the monitor around and showed us our baby's heartbeat - "strong" as she described it. Too early to hear via ultrasound, but we could see that heart pumping away. I was overwhelmed and so excited! There is life in me and it's growing! Praise Jesus!

So many fears were released the night before during my prayer time and then when I saw that little heart beating on the screen I was changed. The signs of life and the shape of the little person changed me. The best is that I feel more confident, especially since I am only 2 weeks away from the second trimester. I know anything can happen during a pregnancy but I'm believing for January 2011 that I'll be holding my baby.

I called all my siblings that afternoon. Talked with most of them by the end of the night and it felt great to finally share the news with them. I love them and miss them all so much and wish I could be around them to share this time in my life. They're all aunties and uncles many times over but this is the first from me. :)

So how am I feeling at 10 weeks? Still tender and growing in the "chest" area. Ketchup is my only weird heightened flavor I like. But it is strange that vegetables do not appeal to me, while beef does a little more than usual (I guess I need protein). I am still more sluggish often, and feel best when I get a lot of sleep, but in the last week have been hit with some insomnia symptoms. That sucks, especially when I have to work the next morning. I am not showing, but I'm often bloated enough that it could look that way, Lol. Feeling a little self-conscious about my changing body at times, but embracing it knowing that it means I'm gonna be a mama. I still get nausea but still haven't actually blown - thank goodness. If I don't let my stomach get real empty, I can avoid the intense nausea. And yes, I'm moody and emotional. I can't watch Oprah without losing track of how many times I tear up or cry haha!

>>Hope i can sleep tonight

Kinda anxious, but very eXcited, because tomorrow we have our first real doctor appointment. Hopefully it will be our first ultrasound! I will probably request one if they don't think they're going to do one because it is time. I know a lot of women get there's around 6-8 weeks but I'm about to hit 10-weeks, and I'm ready to see what's going on in there. :)

I don't know how I'll react when I hear the heartbeat. Wow.

>>Dreams, hunger, what surfing?

Tomorrow marks 9-weeks. I am excited but can't believe how long 1 week can be in my mind. It'll be almost another week still before I see my doctor next Friday, at which time I will hopefully have an ultrasound. :) Our first!

They say you could have more vivid dreams while pregnant...yep! I have always been a dreamer; full length, color features. But they have definitely been a little more creative and I can tell I'm dreaming every single night because I am remembering them a lot. (Usually that's just fine, nothing bad so far.)

Dreaming is only possible if my tummy is full apparently. I can't get to sleep or go back to sleep once I've been up long enough for my stomach to realize it's hungry. I used to be able to ignore this feeling most of the time but not anymore. Hunger overrides all. A couple crackers won't do. It's gotta be at least half a sandwich for the bean to let up. Haha

As far as exercise, I went on my first hike since we moved here; my first time up Diamond Head. It was a nice pace and length, and the view at the top was awesome of course, but it doesn't replace surfing! :/ I didn't go once this week. I did swim, but no wave riding, sadly. I wanted to cut back but none is rough. I used to go 1-3 times per week, usually twice, but because of the risk of getting hit in the belly (or head) I know I should stay away from those crowded Waikiki waters if possible. *sigh* It will be worth it, I know.

♥

>>*Time flies, cont'd

A big reason why time is crawling for me right now is my pregnancy. I am anticipating these next 5-weeks or so til I can tell everyone because I've passed that dreaded window. I'm trying not to be scared or too fixated on it but I am definitely feeling realistic about the fact that there's no guarantee I'll carry this baby to full term. We are trying to take

one

step

at

a

time.

We are praying that way too; praying for a fetus, since technically right now, it's an embryo. May seem strange, but it's how I'm coping, and how my honey is keeping me grounded. He's the best.

I've had one more day where I didn't feel so well, which was because I didn't sleep much the night before my doctor's visit on Thursday. They "confirmed" my pregnancy by doing the same pee test I did at home...um, ok. I was kind of expecting a blood test or something, and maybe for my doctor to be there (she wasn't, they didn't tell me until after I had peed in the cup......"oh, did you have questions?" WTH). I did have questions for my doctor, but went blank trying to contain my frustration when they told me like I should know she's not there on Thursdays. Of course I have questions, I'm pregnant! For the first time!

Anyways, I have told those I'm closest to and those that are in our lives most: sister-friends, parents, youth group leaders, most coworkers, and his sister knows. I am waiting to tell my siblings for another week or two, and he's doing the same with his two best friends. It's funny the difference between guys and girls. I would've preferred to not tell parents yet, because his parents are going to tell the whole family and I had to ask my parents to not do so (we're not as close) but I have a way to go before I'm in the safer zone. I will just dread recontacting to inform them if I do have a miscarriage.

It's gonna be a crawl for now; I'll be 7-weeks on Sunday, with many more to go. :)

>>To remain unpublished until...

My period was supposed to start around Fri May 21st...but never did. I have been fairly regular, with a average cycle length of 34 days. I noticed my boobs feeling tender, around Tue, but tried to brush it off (although my mind has not stopped thinking about the possibility of being pregnant since my first day being late!).

Jason went to the store and bought a box with 2 tests inside. He was sleeping even after my nap since he works the night but I took a pregnancy test before he got up because I couldn't wait any longer. It was POSITIVE. I half expected it to be negative, even if I really was pregnant since that's what happened to my mom. Buuuuut nope. :) I put it back in the box, and once he was up I made him bring it to me when I was in the bathroom as if I was going to take it and he pulled out the positive stick. His reaction was great; no disappointment to be seen. We prayed together and are excited. I've made an appointment with my doctor for next Thursday morning, June 3rd.

[pic: pee stick...yep, I peed on that]

An ironic thing is that I started a food journal about 2 weeks ago, since we've been getting sick so much, I wanted to see if my eating habits may have anything to do with it. Turns out there were improvements I could make, and I made them right away (now just to maintain them). The great thing is that I know what I've been eating and not eating for about half of my pregnancy. According to my calculations (4/27: the first time we "tried" since my last period) I am 4 weeks. According to the traditional method (4/18: the first day of my last period) I am almost 6 weeks. Big difference. We'll see who's right when the baby is born, but I'm sure calculations will be based off the traditional methods. ;)

Looks like I fell off my blogging train again. Life has picked up I guess and sometimes I feel lost in the mix.

One of my dearest bestest friends now lives here! As of the 9th she is a local girl. :) I so wish we lived in the same town but we're getting together fairly often so far and making it work.

I went to the Brian McKnight concert on Valentine's Day with my friend (a girl). It was a great show; he's a true vocalist and is actually very funny. I don't think I'll ever get tired of his voice. I wish I could've gone with my boo but he had to work so we spent time before that. (I don't think he would've enjoyed it as much as me and my friend anyways.)

My honey made it up to me the following Tuesday by surprising me with a trip up north to the Polynesian Cultural Center. I had never been to that luau - or any other luau on this island actually. The food was good, but I wish we got there sooner to see more stuff around the exhibits. We took a canoe ride, and the show at the end of the night was cool. It was a big production, and I liked how they come up and down the isles throughout the whole show.

I finally had my pre-conception check-up last week. I was way overdue for my annual exam so it all worked out. My doctor said I'm healthy and she would expect me to have no problem getting pregnant, even with my cyst issues and longterm pill usage. She also did a cholesterol check on the spot. If I had just waited and not eaten my granola bar in the lobby it would've been a fasting glucose level but at least I have an update: my overall cholesterol went down 9 points, and while I do have high good cholesterol, I also have high bad cholesterol. I hate thinking about that stuff but it kind of weighs on the back of my mind. I am thin, active, and maintain a relatively healthy diet BUT my genes have betrayed me and I still have to watch my cholesterol. Poo. On the up side, I've increased my soy intake via tofu and soy milk. I started before I had the news about my cholesterol since I read soy can help encourage fertility on the woman's side. We'll see if it makes a difference for either of my goals!

And now, it's boo time. We would be surfing, but I'm trying not to prolong my sickness. Just a cold I think, but why drag it out when the waves may not be so good today anyway. I may not be so willing to pass once summer comes around...